I Didn’t Really Get Straight As: How God Changed my Grades
By: Winnie Monu
Permit me to debunk the preconceived notion of that title by stating, yes, I did in fact obtain Straight As – and only by the grace of God.
2015 was not the easiest year for me. March was the “beginning of the end,” as I used to call it, as that was the month everything that was “perfect” in my life was pulled from right underneath my feet. It was one of my darkest moments, as I dealt with who I was, thus being catapulted into God's presence desperate for Him to fix it.
What is it?
Everything.
A broken relationship, freedom from past pain, fear of the future and oh of course, the present – my grades.
So, on March 22, I had enough. After having quiet time with God, I became mad. I know. That’s an oxymoron. A paradox. God is the peaceful safe haven we run to. We give our yoke for His (Matthew 11:28-29). We’re supposed to come to Him upset and leave happy. Well, I came broken and left a soldier. Ever heard of Holy Anger? I had some and I was ready for war. I was sick of crying, and asking God, why me? And the only way I knew how to fight was through prayer.
During my quiet time, I reminded God of every story, I could think of, in the bible of where He had moved in the impossible – Gideon (Judges 6), Daniel’s prayer (Daniel 9:3), Joshua (Joshua 1:9), and Isaiah (Isaiah 45:2)– I ended my winded rant with God and said,
“If You can do it for them, You can do it for me. You promised me that You don’t lie. The moment that happens I’m closing my bible and turning away from Christianity. So fix this.”
Yes, I had an audacious Olivia Pope moment, but God handled things far better than an over-hyped fictional character ever could. And yes, grace is very sufficient as God allowed me to remain alive after speaking to Him with such fervor and tenacity. I plead with you to not use this as an opportunity to speak to God anyhow!
But I did not care. God does say, “Come boldly before my throne;present your case to me and let us reason” (Hebrews 4:16, Isaiah 41:21)And I did. I proceeded to write down everything on my heart that I knew I needed for God to move in. And, unashamedly, the very first point I wrote was “Straight A’s in my academics.”
As a then junior, I knew what my anticipated post-graduation plans were, but my grades didn’t match those dreams. For someone as myself who effortlessly glided through High School with Straight A’s all 4 years, I never saw anything less than a 4.0 on my report card.
For those who know what it means to attend a public Ivy League or a commonly known institute, such as University of Maryland, College Park, you know why we attribute that informal prestige to ourselves. University of Maryland is where many high school scholars, like myself, are humbled within their first semesters as a student. It was in 2012, the year I matriculated to college, that the universities board decided to up the antsy and implement the plus/minus system. What possessed them to do such, till today we Terps may never know. But it happened, and I joined everyone else and studied the way I knew how.
But that was the problem. I didn’t know how to study. So I assumed no physical homework meant one of two things: I chose a great major that had little to no homework or I had more time for sleep. The combination of the two soon resulted in a stark, harsh reality leading to failure, as my first semester grades became the combination of the first three letters of the alphabet. I soon learned the truth behind, “There’s always something to do for a class even if you have no homework – read ahead.”
Backtrack to March 22, 2015: I knew enough was enough. After writing down a few things that I was trusting God for, I put the pen down and got to work. Unfortunately, after that semester I did not get Straight A's, but I did proudly make Dean’s List with a 3.67 gpa.
After I had cleaned my room of all textbooks, I found the same list that I had written earlier in the semester. I quickly skimmed the list and laughed at the eight audacious requests I wrote to God and said, “Well God, maybe it is impossible to get Straight A’s at University of Maryland.” And I put the paper back down.
Some months later, the movie that many Christians, like myself, rushed to watch in anticipation – War Room – stirred a new fire in me. After seeing it with a girlfriend of mine, I went home and heard the Holy Spirit say, “revisit that list you wrote, keep it in plain view, and watch Me move. My timing is not your timing.” So I did. I thumb tacked my list to the wall in my closet and used that as my reminder.
Fall semester began and proved to be one of the hardest semesters of my life, as I believe I was spiritually attacked at so many strategic times. These attacks always seemed to happen right before an exam. There were days, I would be studying and I would be presented with some bad news that shifted my whole mood right before an exam.
Surprisingly, this was also the semester I decided to do more – in everything. For the first time, I led a women’s connect group, remained a research assistant, held office as President of the School of Public Health Dean’s Committee, worked as an resident assistant, all while challenging my sanity to take an 18 credit course load.
Through the hype of all my obligations, I found myself doing the opposite of my responsibilities. There were days I would watch John Gray messages on YouTube rather than write a paper. Nights before an exam, I would prefer to journal in my quiet time and eventually fall asleep! It just seemed like I wanted to do everything else, but schoolwork.
Those who know me closely know I have a very unorthodox way of studying. Please don’t copy me.
Finals came and my confidence level to easily pass one of my classes, Family Law, exam was quickly plateaued once I finished the exam. I left knowing I didn’t do so well. I didn’t study. I relied on my own ability to just wing it and possibly end with an A in the class, but I was greatly mistaken. I indeed failed. I got a 16/33 –( for those who tried to reach for a calculator, it’s a 48%).I had never scored anything that low in my life. I couldn’t even cry; I was numb. My 96% in that class dropped to an 85.3%.
As soon as I was about to accept my grade for what it was, God gently said, “study as hard for every other exam and make this your only B. And after, ask for what you want.” So I did. I put the laziness behind and studied for every other exam as if my life depended on it.
After the first set of exams, I kept feeling edgy, and God repeated the latter part of what he said to me, “Ask for what you want.” I challenged God and said, ‘how? It’s impossible. Final exams are final and my grade is a B, there’s nothing she’s going to do, my professor is a Lawyer! If I email her with anything, she’ll shut me down because lawyers know email threads could get them in trouble.
But God gently reminded me,
“I have already gone ahead of you, ask for what you want.
So I boldly did. I asked myself,“what’s the most she could do? Say ‘no.” I initially requested if I could see my exam grade (hoping that if I stared at it long enough and acted dumbfounded, she would mysteriously do something in my favor) and second, if it was possible to re-do my final exam. Crazy, I know.
She declined the latter. But God! God used my work ethic in her class throughout the semester as leverage. He went above and beyond,reminding her of how well I had done throughout the semester and by His grace, she went ahead and changed my grade to an A-!
I honestly believe that had I not been humbled by this exam grade and listened to the first part of God’s instruction to “study as hard for every other exam and make this [my] only B,” I would have taken my other classes for granted and not studied hard enough.
At the end of finals, I look at my grades and I thank God for achieving straight A’s, but those who know me know I like to push myself and I wasn’t too satisfied. My straight A’s was not a 4.0 as the plus/minus system, for lack of better words, doesn’t let us be great.
But as I was thanking God for my grades and reflecting back, He whispered, “you did not ask me for a 4.0, you asked me for Straight A’s.” Wow!! I started laughing with God because he was so right! My God is a God of humor.
I’ve discovered these lessons through my journey in 2015:
1. In the words of the recent SnapChat sensation, DJ Khaled, “the key to success”…is God.
2. The power of being Specific. I look at my grades and I thank God I did in fact get Straight A’s, but my straight A’s was not a 4.0. Be specific in everything that you ask God for.
3. There is treasure in your darkest moments.
4. Be authentic with God. He already knows what’s on your heart might as well just say it – and write it down!
5. God is still in the business of doing the impossible.
I encourage you, as we begin 2016, to write down everything you are holding onto God for and watch him move.
And at the end may you say, for this reason, _____________________ I put God first.
Winnie Monu attends University of Maryland, College Park, as a Bio-chem & Family Science major. Her hobbies when she's not focused on her new business, TruthbTold, she's exploring new places.