ZENAS
Tell us about yourself.
I am Zenas Oluwatobi Okanlawon. I am 23 glorious years old. I am a dancer and dance teacher and I come from two beautiful Nigerian parents who birthed me in Laurel, MD.
When did you discover that you had a passion to dance and decided to pursue this gift?
When I was young, I was passionate about whatever it was that I was doing. So if it was school and academics, I was passionate about it. I started playing violin at a young age and I was very passionate about that.
Then I started dancing because I went to a performing arts elementary school (I got in through [the] lottery) and became passionate about that. I just wanted to be good at whatever I was doing, no matter what it was. I didn't really decide to pursue dance as a career though until my junior year in high school when I was applying for colleges. I had invested a great deal of time and energy to dance [and] decided that I wanted to be adamant about perfecting that gift.
Was dancing natural for you, or did you have to work to discover you had this gift?
Yes and no. I think it was clear that I had some talent, but I had absolutely no control of my body. I enjoyed dancing, but I remember being a flexible mess in dance class. I could throw my leg up and pop into a split, but that was about it. People told me I was talented and so I ran with that and began to take the training serious. So I put in a lot of work. I am still putting in work to perfect this gift. The process really never ends.
Having African parents in this Era, how was it pursuing a Dance Performance degree?
It was a headache! HAHA! I never ignored the words my Father told me through the process of choosing a major. What he was saying wasn’t always the issue because I knew that every word he said to me was out of the hope that he knew would be actualized in my life. He loved me so much [that] he could not bear seeing me struggle or fail in any way. As I think back, I want to carefully say that perhaps a lot of what he advised me stemmed from fear. He feared I would have to experience some of the same struggles he experienced in this country. So, again, my issue was not always with what he was saying. The issue was the immensely strong internal pull that I had to face everyday that drew me towards dance. It was like even when I wanted to ignore it, I somehow found myself back in the studio, wanting to dig deeper into the field. I argued a lot with my dad about my choice to major in dance. He partially supported me, but wanted me to focus on something more “solid” and promising in terms of a career and a stable, sufficient income. I appeared to be stubborn, as if my certainty was assured. But internally I was battling myself so hard. I dedicated so much time to prayer for direction because this issue left me immensely confused. Of course I wanted to make good money, but I felt like people didn’t see in me what I saw. I saw a girl who was hard working, who needed to just be the best in her field to find success. I saw a girl that was crafted with a unique way of seeing the world and seeing success.
I did not want to chase after money. I wanted to be the best at what God had created me to be and then believe Him for all the things I need to “survive.” I believed that if God really could do “ALL THINGS,” He could also help in this area. And it wasn’t about just being a dancer. I wanted to do whatever God told me to do. I just wanted to be obedient to Abba.
People generally “encouraged” me to be wise, A.K.A take the safe route. But safe was boring to me, and safe wasn’t what I heard God telling me to be. I never desired to be a rebel. I just desired to maximize the potential God placed in me. I wanted to believe that when my body eventually dies, it would be emptied of the things I was created to do on earth.
When did you start dancing to glorify God?
I realized my gift of dance was a gift from God when I joined Spirit Wings Dance Company and Studio at the age of 9. So that’s when I started dancing for the glory of Jesus.
Do you have any past or future projects dedicated to your craft?
YES! I’ve been blessed with so many awesome opportunities in the past and looking forward to all God has planned for me in the future. Currently, I am working with Chandini Darby, an amazing dancer and mentor, on a project called B.F.A. (Beauty for Ashes) that will premiere on April 12,2015 at the Howard County Center for the Arts.
Who and/or what inspires you to dance? Who and/or what is your muse?
When I was younger, I looked up dance in the bible and of course one of the first stories
I learned about was David dancing shamelessly before the Lord with all his might. That story inspires me to never be ashamed.
I recently revisited that feeling of unrestricted, abandoned worship to God through dance.
Judith Jamison was one of the first black female dancers I learned about. I did a project about her in elementary school and I was so intrigued and captured by her beauty. She is the Artistic Director Emerita of the Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater. Learning about her also opened my eyes to this amazing dance company based in NYC. I began to study Ailey and was so amazed that these dancers were amongst the best in the world and many of them were my skin color! Through my Ailey obsession, I found a dancer named Dwana Smallwood and connected [with her] immediately. She still inspires me to find authenticity in what I do. Here is one of my favorite Dwana moments:
Last, but certainly not least, the legacy of my late mother inspires me to be excellent in dance. She was a hard-working woman that loved to spread love. When I think of her, I remember how great I can be.
Is there anything else you desire to use dancing for?
I am blessed with the opportunity to use dance as a tool for youth development and I would love to keep exploring that. I want to travel the world and see how youth respond to dance in different parts of the world. Dance has also always been a healing mechanism for me. I want to share that with people – not merely dance, but discovering the things God created you to do. That is healing power. I also want to explore how dance will bring communities back together.
What keeps you motivated?
Jesus. And really great art/artists. Diversity. Sometimes tragedy. People who love me and encourage me. People that pursue Jesus unashamedly. Beauty. Oh, and the opportunity to love others – that fuels me.
Who is your biggest fan?
I would say, probably my sisters. I get crazy support from them. At times it is hard to find people who understand your crazy decisions. I don’t think they fully understand, but they still support me blindly. They are consistent.
One of my sisters constantly calls me “superstar.” I have never seen myself as such, but every time she says that, it inspires me. One of my other sisters told me I was going to be on TV. And then I was! They push me to see myself beyond where I am in the present. My mom and dad are also really awesome. They grew up in a place where dance was apart of the culture within the community, but not necessarily a career. With that said, I do believe they support me the best way they know how!
When I first started dancing, my dad, single at the time and fathering four girls, sacrificed sooooo much to get me to my in numerous rehearsals, shows, performances, etc. I was doing the most, but I don’t remember him ever complaining about it. He easily spent thousands on tuition for dance, attire, gas, food for trips and rehearsal, and the list goes on. My mom floods me with ideas of how I will succeed as a dancer. Sometimes I look at her crazy, but that doesn't seem to stop her!
My amazing friend, Yvonne Eseonu, has also been a great supporter since the time she met me. She went to the extent of even contacting a dance company on my behalf, but without my knowledge, that I admired a lot. She is always going out of her way to show me that she believes in me.
I would also say my mentor, Chandini Darby who has held me up through so many years of tears, fear, trauma, and moments of doubt and insecurities. Lastly, my spiritual mother, Dr. Mitchell who has been to every single one of my shows – even the ones I deliberately tell her not to come to!
When was your favorite ministration?
I don’t think I have a favorite. Every opportunity to dance is a true blessing!
A spoken word and dance collaboration with Lu Ade.